Gang of Eight

Republicans Go To War . . . With Themselves

As we plunge headlong into the end of the year, less than two handfuls of Republicans have practically guaranteed that nothing will get done at the federal level. The last time anything so entertaining took place, the President was impeached for lying about sex, the Speaker of the House resigned, and his likely successor gave up his House seat due to his sexual infidelity. Back in the 20th century, Republicans knew how to Party.

This bit of showmanship is credited to Matt Gaetz, a junior congressperson from Florida who appears to aspire to Newt Gingrich's level of pirate politics. Newt was widely known for pettiness and carrying a grudge, along with ethics violations and a lengthy affair with a woman young enough to be his daughter. Newt topped it off by telling his first wife, who was dying of cancer and about to have surgery, that he was leaving her because "She is not young enough or pretty enough to be the wife of the President. And besides, she has cancer." As one might guess, Newt was one of the first to support The Donald for President (both have had three wives).

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Setting the Stage

Unusual Suspects Americans face seemingly insurmountable problems and need someone to blame. We have mastered the world. America is the most prosperous and powerful country on Earth, and we tend to take credit for that success. However, we cannot do everything and some things we do have unintended side effects that we cannot control. For example, we do not treat everyone equally. While many things point to why, the greater truth is we have not figured out how to make that workable. We have created a great deal but consumed a great deal to do so. This has created problems such as pollution, which we have struggled for decades to ameliorate with minimal success. We invest trillions in our military but cannot stop wars, and we provide others with weapons to fight. We reached the top but now watch others climb past us. We are the wealthiest country with the highest debt and have no plan to settle it....

Political Football

Alabama Plays the Trump Card to Defeat Georgia Candidate Trump wearing Georgia Red with Crimson Tide supporters The only thing more divisive than this year's election would probably be the Alabama/Georgia game. While everybody in the stadium was probably as red as blood, the shades made all the difference. Mr. Trump sat with the Alabama Tide because one of his Mar Largo members offered an invite that probably included a campaign contribution. His support was widely noticed in the Tuscaloosa stadium, much to the chagrin of the Georgia fans, who watched as the Tide kept the Bulldogs from reaching the winning goal in the final minutes while tolerating the constant chant 'Eat Them Dawgs' from Tide fans, who were referring to the rumors of Haitians eating neighbors' pets in Springfield, Ohio, not the Bulldogs. Mr. Trump got caught between high Tide and many potential Georgia voters. It was more entertaining than the halftime show.

2024's Longest Running Joke Finally Has a Punchline

Ron DeSantis finally ended his Goofy quest with a whimper of a misquote , which seemed to punctuate his campaign. Churchill would be baffled, as were the voters. Perhaps, Ron was quoting former president George W. Bush, who was also famous for malapropisms.

Election Entertainment

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